Quote:Green_Frog wrote on May 29
th, 2008 at 10:34am:
"If a frog had a gun in his pocket, he would have to be afraid of snakes" Old Southern Proverb
the (well armed) Green Frog
Although I do not speak Southern fluently, I have extensive experience with it and thought I understood it well. This, however, does not compute.
Meaning absolutely no disrespect to the Frog (after all, he admitted he was half-asleep), the actual quotation is slightly different. It was inspired by other such classics as "Yeah,
IF is the biggest word in the world!" & "Yeah, if wishes were horses then beggars would ride!" and "If a frog had wings then he wouldn't bump his butt every time he hopped!"; these comments were of course designed to stifle the whiners in whatever group, you know, the ones who're always saying "If only.." when their plans go wrong.
This eventually morphed into a somewhat more obscure expression, thus: "Yeah, and if a frog had pockets then he wouldn't hafta be scared of snakes!" The unsuspecting whiner would frequently then ask about the pockets, whereupon the perpetrator would reply, "Well,
if he had pockets then he could carry a gun to shoot 'em!"
This is all in the spirit of male camaraderie, you understand (G). The Rules say that you hafta point out, nay you hafta
emphasize, loudly and repeatedly, any possible mistake or awkwardness committed by your best buddy. The usual practice is to say, "Yeah, and if a frog had pockets....." gradually tailing off into silence with the rest being unspoken but understood.
The understood part being, "Yeah, quitcher whining already you wussy, you sound like a gurl, just shuddup and get serious!" or words to that effect. You know, the Male Bonding thing (VBG), pointing out how use of the 'if only' excuse makes the whiner seem, at best, petty and unworldly (if not a totally unredeemable pervert, VBG).
The ultimate triumph is to have your best buddy so speechless with rage and frustration that the only response he can manage is to make a rude suggestion & flip you off; then you know you've won!
Regards, Joe